Final Countdown?

A Mayan Party 5,125 Years in the Making

Over 3,000 years before cannabis probably helped inspire the Book of Revelation, the Mayan calendar began its long count to the 21st of December 2012. On that day, the calendar ends . . . some say so does the world. If you enjoyed partying like it’s 1999, imagine the Mundo Maya parties as the 5,125-year calendar counts down its final hours. Sure, anthropologists say the local governments are whoring out their sacred sites to irreverent tourists, but if the Mayans didn’t want a party, why did they schedule doomsday for a Friday night? If you’re prime to act like a Mayaniac, here are the five best places to do it.

Palenque, Mexico

Do you save your old Phish ticket stubs or remember when Burning Man was free? If so, Palenque should be your new second home. This jungle-clad town boasts magic mushrooms in the fields and locals who smoke scorpion tails. Early birds can board the Space Mother Ship: Popul Vuh party (Dec. 14-16), but everyone else can turn on, tune out and drop fungi at the Mayan temples.

Copán Ruinas, Honduras

As early as last year, the Honduran government promoted Copán as the place to be in 2012. At present, the tourist-hungry locals are unhappy with the lack of large-scale events, but that certainly makes the city more appealing to culture seekers. The so-called “Athens of the Maya world” is rich in architectural splendor, and local attractions include the Mayan-themed Luna Jaguar Spa Resort.

Riviera Maya, Mexico

The tourist mobs invading Cancún, Playa del Carmen and Tulum will probably make the locals hope this really is the end. Spring break is about to look tame on the Yucatán Peninsula! With beautiful beachfront ruins, Tulum will host the Mayan Holidaze party and the 48-hour Time and Space Festival, while Cancún can expect frat-house beer bonging by dudes in Quetzalcoatl tees. In Playa del Carmen, the UK’s Crosstown Rebels will host the Day Zero party with 24 straight hours of dance music at a lakeside Mayan temple. Break out the glow sticks!

San Ignacio, Belize

The Cayo District in Western Belize offers a celebration amidst vast forest, canoe-ready rivers, thunderous waterfalls and stunning caves. A special event is planned at the Xunantunich ruins, and jungle lodges like duPlooy’s offer Apocalypto specials. San Ignacio is also the reason why Guatemala didn’t make our list. Tourists visit the country’s breathtaking Tikal temples on daytrips from Flores, but San Ignacio also offers daytrips, and the Cayo is a more beautiful place to stay. In fact, the area has been called “a slice of Eden,” so why not end it all in a place reminiscent of where it all began.

Chichén Itzá, Mexico

In 2007, the towering El Castillo temple was named one of the New Seven Wonders of the World, and it is the birthplace of the Mayan calendar. Make no mistake, this place is going to be NYE-in-NYC packed. Guatemalans and Salvadorans might complain that Mexico landed three spots on this list while their countries got none, but Mexico simply produces better tourist-fleecing events. Speaking of which, the Synthesis 2012 party is a hippie-yuppie mashup with DJs, folk music, drum circles, a yoga village and a Friday night party at the temple. The event costs $500 a pop, but don’t be jealous if you can’t go. Chichén Itzá should be ground zero for a Mayan apocalypse, so take comfort in knowing these partiers will get lit up first.