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A trip to Iceland ushers in visual delights and dietary oddities

By David Jenison

Think you’re a Fear Factor all-star because you chewed on a few frog legs or crunche

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A trip to Iceland ushers in visual delights and dietary oddities

By David Jenison

Think you’re a Fear Factor all-star because you chewed on a few frog legs or crunched into a bowl of steamed snails? That’s child’s play. How about slurping down a plate of pickled rams’ testicles?

St. Louis folk might think this explains what happened to their beloved football team in recent years, but Icelanders have been gobblin’ down ram testes since before “Crazylegs” Hirsch was racking up touchdowns. And the tasty tidbits don’t stop there. Did you ever watch Jaws and think, “Wow, I bet that chunk of shark meat would taste money if I let it rot on a hook”? The Vikings did, and it’s called hákarl, a blue cheese-like plate of putrefied shark cubes. Other menu faves include blubber, seal flippers and head cheese made from, of all things, a jellied sheep’s head. And of course, no self-respecting Icelander would wash down a seal flipper with anything other than the national spirit, Black Death, with its sky-high alcohol content. The Rush Limbaugh crowd can enjoy whale steaks and puffin (a penguin, basically) all year long, but to indulge in these other tummy-yummy treats you’ll need to hit Iceland for Thorrablot, an old-school festival during the Viking month of Thor. This year’s event takes place Jan. 15-Feb. 15, which will probably make for some interesting Valentine’s dates.

You’ve come for the sheep-head quesadilla, but what else is there to do this time of year? Iceland is close to the Arctic Circle, so with winter’s limited sun, it’s the perfect time to get cosmic with the Aurora Borealis, a.k.a. the Northern Lights. It is also one of the few places where you can buy a whale penis wallet, the making of which qualifies as one of the worst day jobs ever. The pricey wallet probably isn’t the best conversation piece at a Sierra Club social, but it’s great for the guy who wants to say he’s got a whale of a penis in his pants.

Still, the grandest adventures await those who venture out. See the European and North American tectonic plates tear apart at Thingvellir National Park or visit the icy volcanic crater from Jules Verne’s Journey to the Center of the Earth at Snaefellsjokull. Movie geeks can swim in the geothermal Blue Lagoon from Hostel: Part II and shake things up like 007 at the Jokulsarlon glacier lake from Die Another Day. Metal fans naturally gravitate to the north’s Myvatn lake region to see Dimmuborgir’s Gates of Hell (which exit into New Jersey), while ocean junkies take a dip in the Atlantic at the Nautholsvik Thermal Beach where they actually pump hot water into the sea. And for those who don’t think Icelanders are obsessed enough already, the city of Husavik features what must be the world’s only Phallological Museum. While most people don’t even know “phallological” is a word, this shrine contains more than one hundred penises, from the walrus to the polar bear.

While the locals should be teased about their phallomania, go easy on the huldufólk, the elf-like hidden people that many Icelanders believe exist. These creatures merit their own museum and “elf spotting” tours, so any jokes will go over about as well as an Al Gore speech on whaling.

It’s also worth noting that, with a name like Iceland, the country doesn’t produce the best smoke, and the police issue steep fines for possession. Use with caution, preferably on treks outside the city.

Finally, for those intrigued, a trip to Iceland might be easier than you think. For flights between Europe and the U.S., Icelandair offers a free stop-over in the capital (Reykjavik) where you can extend your layover for up to a week. This writer experienced Iceland on a free stop-over between Amsterdam and NYC, while other European destinations include London, Paris, Barcelona and Berlin, among others. If you’re going to Europe already, this is a great way to see Iceland without buying an extra ticket. The money saved could score a sweet Viking costume for Thorrablot (Brett Favre jerseys don’t count), or for a little fun, squeeze your little brother into an elf outfit and watch Black Death intoxication work its magic.

www.icelandair.com, www.visiticeland.com.

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