Obviously, if you don’t want to smoke your medicine you can ingest it via edibles and take it easy on your lungs. But if you want something fast-acting and more discrete, you can turn to a tincture which is essentially marijuana extract in an alcohol or glycerin solution. In fact, this is exactly the kind of thing that grandma (and Queen Victoria) kept in her medicine cabinet for her aches and pains. We had the pleasure of trying out two tinctures from the Mentone Patients Association, which carries Delta Nine Molecular Medicine in the form of “Quiet Dragon” (doctor formulated for calming purposes) and “Grass Hopper” (for pain relief). Since glycerin is used, this tincture is slightly sweeter than your alcohol varieties and stores well in a cool, dark place. A few sepia-toned drops under the tongue (the tincture is absorbed directly into the bloodstream this way) and you’re soon on your way to a quiet reverie and absolute total tranquility. Better living through chemistry, I say. (Michael Carlos)
